One month

My devious looking little boy is a little over one month old now!

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Don’t forget to remember yourself. 

Or your other loved ones for that matter.

Having a baby is hard work! While its totally worth it, and such and amazing thing to have this tiny life to protect, you NEED to make time for yourself! Thats much easier said than done. I’m 3 weeks postpartum and ive come to realize stir crazy is real. Your baby is going to depend on you for quite a while, to feed him, change him, snuggle him, so many things he needs from you, that he cant do for himself. But while youre juggling all that how do you make sure you’re fed, dressed, and properly taken care of? I honestly have no idea. I haven’t quite mastered that either, but its important to try. Whether that be having daddy take over, so you can shower and relax for 10 minutes, or go for a walk, whatever it is you need to do to get your “me time” in. Im lucky enough to have the support of my fiance and my mother, but I know some moms have no one. More power to you girl because being a new mom is more than stressful. Sleeping is unheard of, showering by yourself is a theory, and time alone with your significant other? You’re joking right? I always hear about those super hybrid women that go back to work sooner than later, full time and have the time and energy to do their makeup, and get dressed everyday. I don’t know how they do it. I guess my point is that even tho having a new life to care for is wonderful, magical even. But if you dont take a moment for yourself youre going to crash, and fast. If any of you have the secret to balance life and a baby let me know. Until then, I’m doing the best I can. 

Labor and delivery?

I figured Id go into detail about my birthing experience here, because while pregnant, I searched the web far and wide for any and every kind of knowledge I needed for my future delivery. Warning this may get a little TMI, but any expecting mother, or person looking for advice is going to have to get over that real quick haha. 

At about 9am Sunday morning I woke up having what felt like mild period cramps, you know, the achy back and not so right stomach feeling. I figured it was just the normal aches and pains of pregnancy that I had been having for the last 9 months or so.  But when I went to use the bathroom for the millionth time I had realized I was bleeding. Yes from the nether regions…Which naturally freaked me out seeing as I hadnt had any in months, I called my doctor, and she told me it was normal. As long as I wasnt filling a pad, and if I started having contrations I should start timing them. Well im a first timer here thinking I dont know what the hell a contraction feels like. I asked her if these sporadic cramping like period pains were contractions? She said no. She was wrong…Very wrong. As the day progressed my cramps got stronger, and closer together but nothing I couldnt handle. Finally around 8pm I called her back and said that the cramps were worse, closer together, and the bleeding hadnt stopped. She told me to go to the L&D department at my hospital just to get checked out. Excited and nervous, me my fiance and my mother packed the hospital bags in the car, just incase and headed to the hospital. When we got there the nurse in triage asked me a million questions and hooked me up to a monitor. This monitor was able to track babies heart rate, mine and record any contractions I may have been having. And sure enough I was having contractions! I had told her that a few nights prior I had noticed I was leaking a tiny amount of clear fluid in the middle of the night. I was under the impression it was discharge, or perhaps pee seeing as us pregnant ladies are very good at keeping all that under control. Gross. So she had me undress from the waste down, and said she would check for dilation and if my water had broke. Sure as shit she looks up and nonchalantly says “yeah your water broke.” I hade that feeling where your heart feels like its tanking into your stomach. I knew that it had been a few days since I had the leaking which meant there could be an infection if gone to long uncared for. Luckly none of that! But apparently there was a small tear in the amniotic sac at the top, which caused the slow leak. FUN! With that said I was admitted to the hospital and we were there to stay! I wasnt sure if I was horrified or excited that this meant my baby would be here sooner than we thought. Mind you this was the night before my 39th week of pregnancy. 

Once admitted, we got into our delivery room and got the run down of what would happen in the hours to come. Since my water had “broken” god knows when, they said we could wait and see if labor progressed fast enough on its own, otherwise they would need to further break my water and induce me to keep any infection from starting. And thank the gods I was well on my way to having this baby fast enough on my own without needing any help. Contractions got much, MUCH stronger and while sitting in my hospital bed I felt a large pop and a gush of liquid…Little man was ready to get the show on the road lol. I changed into my hospital gown and played the waiting game of dilation. Finally I got to about 9cm dilated and 100% effaced and was ready to try the wonderful epidural. I always wanted to have a non-medicated birth, but let me just say, epidurals are the most fantastic thing ever created. It took the pain down dramatically, however I was still able to feel everything, and walk just no pain. Its a weird sensation but absolutely worth it. 

When the time came to push I was on my back and doing what the doctor told me to do, but when I started pushing my little mans heart rate would drop with each push, I was so scared for his health that it caused me to not push as hard as I could. Finally they had me lay on my left side, which seemed to counteract whatever was causing his heart rate to drop when I pushed. I wasnt complaining tho, trying to push a baby out of your vagina is surprisingly much easier at an angle. After a half an hour of pushing I felt a wave of relief, when the doctor and my family were cheering because I had just delivered this beautiful little boy. 

Personally, I feel like I had a very easy labor. Or maybe I have a high pain tolerance? Either way it was a pretty badass experience. I don’t know that I want more children, but I do know that I would do it a million times over to have my little man here. 

A whole new world

On Monday, July 24, 2017 at 6:04am I gave birth to the most magical little boy I have ever met.

6 lbs. 13 oz. and 20 inches long, a full head of dark brown hair, almond shaped eyes, and a dimple in his chin. I am so in love. After 10 hours in labor, with a half hour of pushing, they laid this perfect (or at least in my eyes) little boy on my chest and I had no idea what to think, or feel for that matter. I cried, I laughed, I was so happy he was finally here. Now he didnt cry like a new born baby normally does, he yelled! Right at the nurse after she suctioned out his little nose and throat. Just one little harty battle cry. Its so funny, you spend 9 months waiting for this one moment and then it happens, and you have no idea what its going to be like. I could not believe how amazing being a mother is until this moment, and I wouldnt change it for the world.